DATE OR DIE*

I have two settings for social interactions: incredibly awkward or deadpan sarcastic (is that a thing?) - Both of which are not ideal for dating. Thus, my life is probably more of a ‘what not to do’ model rather than a ‘how-to’ guide. For example, do not wear a black g-string under a moderately see-through dress (always nude underwear, girls! If you’re only going to take one thing from this please, please, let it be that).

I guess the first step is finding someone to hang out with. I couldn’t really tell you where to look but I can certainly tell you where not to. Any nightclub really. Anywhere past 1 am. And, for goodness sake, not your ex.

 If you do manage to find someone who you like, you’re going to have to navigate the minefield that is communicating in the digital age. Don’t stress about crafting the ~PeRfEcT tXt~ (probably don’t text him like that though) and for the love of God, do not go 157 weeks deep into his Instagram because you will like an old picture of him and his girlfriend and this is the consequence for being a creep.

(This is a rare picture of me questioning everything after liking a 157-week-old Instagram picture)

So you’ve made it through unscathed and you’re ready to hang with your new fella, but what to wear?

Avoid anything bodycon. It leaves nothing to the imagination and absolutely no room for that extra slice of pizza.

Black is always best. It’s very flattering and spill-proof 98% of the time (why do you think I’m always wearing black?)

If you’re going to drinks or dinner wear casual heels. No bedazzling, no elaborate straps and nothing too high. A simple mule like these or a midi heel like this pair will keep you looking nonchalant.

In a more casual setting you can’t go wrong with jeans and a tee. Slip on some slides and you’re ready to go!

x. G.

Wearing: Bassike Dress | Nicholas Vest (similar here and here) | Zara Heels (similar here)

*The dying I’m referring to here is dying of embarrassment when you lean in for a kiss and he kisses you're forehead.

Photographer: Tennyson Tostee | Assistant: Shani Ishigaki